Ten Golden rules for your first date
Be thoughtful and romantic but don't come across too strong as this can be off putting......
There are many things to avoid doing on a first date and some things you need to be doing on your first date too, first impressions count a lot, so it is important to get things right, here are ten Golden rules which will make a lot of difference as well as helping to make the right impressions!
First date - don't over think the first date venue
Kaz Psychic is a love and relationships specialist
with lots of helpful advice to offer.
In this article Kaz advises on the behavioral do's and don't's of a first date.
The very last thing anyone wants to do is to ruin their chances of making a success of a first date, especially when your dating someone hot and to whom are very attracted to, so here is some vital advice to help you to avoid having things go badly wrong!
You might also find Kaz's article - 'The Body Language of Love' helpful too, to read it go here.
Beyond that first date and dating generally, if you want to get to a proposal and then marriage, call Kaz - who can remote influence it to happen, and to make your love and relationship dreams come true for you!
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You might decide to try on-line dating web sites, which are a way in which many people meet these days, but often the long-winded forms you are asked to fill out on site are very daunting, it is hard for some people to write about themselves, and to to chose the right profile picture, etc.
Sadly, dating websites can leave many vulnerable men and women to scammers, who can of course, pretend to be anything they like from behind their computer screens. Many dating site members have been scammed out of their life savings by dating site scammers and damaged, their lives put at risk meeting total strangers, some with a history of violence and abuse of previous partners. It is hard to know who is a genuine person looking for love and who is a scammer. Be careful you don't get duped.
To check out Kaz's Psychic's page on the "Dating site nightmare" go here.
To check if you are in touch with a dating site scammer or a genuine person via "Pig Busters" go here.
After getting over the first hurdle of having asked someone out on a date, or having been asked out on a date, be it via a dating website or from meeting in a more candid and general way, you are than faced with having to ensure that you can make a good first impression whilst praying that it will all run nice and smoothly!
For those meeting via a dating site, the added problem is in finding out whether what was a virtual reality on line is a reality in the real world. So many people have turned up at an agreed meeting venue and found that the person waiting there for them, looks nothing like the person they portrayed themselves as being on their dating profile, plunging them into a very tense rendezvous and one they want to escape from as fast as humanely possible, which can in some instances lead to a dangerous set of consequences in the hands of a violent or dangerous person
The dating gurus at a dating site called 'Singles Badge', a social networking site for singles, came up with ten golden rules to help you to get through your first date and to ensure that you are able to go on a second date.
Here are their ten Golden rules for that all important first date and in the words of "Singles Badge":
Going for a drink in a more intimate pub or bar is probably the best option for a first date. It is safer, there are other's around you in case your date turns out to be an undesirable person in real life (assuming you met via a dating site or were set up on a blind date), and it is advisable to avoid inviting your date home until you have taken the time to get to know them and assessed the level of trust and comfort you have in being with them.
Never allow yourself to be forced into anything more than a drink in a public place until you are sure you are completely safe with this new person in your life.
Some people try to be more adventurous and creative for their first dates, but actually that can over complicate things.
Picking somewhere quiet, where you can have a good chat and get to know each other is worth it in the long run, perhaps a quiet corner of a bar, cafe or restaurant but nevertheless, where there are other people around you.
If there is a second date, the more fun activities can follow, and will be much more appreciated by you both, once you are more relaxed and comfortable with each other.
Dress appropriate for the occasion and be aware of your social environment....
Don't wear a suit unless you are going to an occasion that requires a suit. Wearing a suit can look far too formal and stuffy, if you are out for a drink, then wear something smart/casual.
Make an effort with your appearance.
Jeans or Chino's and a good fitting shirt or a polo shirt make for a strong look.
You can always team that with a suit jacket for good measure.
Wear something that you feel comfortable in; the last thing you need is to be constantly fiddling or pulling your top/skirt down.
You still want to feel amazing in whatever you are wearing though, as this will give you confidence and be wary of shoes that are ill-fitting or too high to walk in. The last thing you want is to topple over, trip or find that if your date is of questionable character, that you unable run for it, in order to escape any unwanted or heavy advances!
That little black dress if teamed with appropriate footwear and accessories is always a good choice, but if it is too short or low cut this is not going to do you any favours, for obvious reasons!
Before the date, make a mental note of some questions to ask.
Keep the conversation a mix of questions about your date and information about yourself, but without sounding like you are overly self-absorbed, egotistical or boastful.
What to order to eat on a first date
Keep it simple but keep it clean.
We all love ribs, but eating them will not show you at your most attractive.
Spaghetti is also not a wise choice either - far too messy and you don't want to finish up with your face and clothing covered in tomato sauce!
Ordering Lamb or Pork chops isn't a good idea either, especially if you intend to pick them up with your fingers and eat the flesh off them, which is just not the done thing in a restaurant anyway!
Don't order a salad and then go and eat all of your date’s chips and always order something that is easy for you to eat and to talk at the same time but do not talk when you have food in your mouth, as this is ill mannered and poor etiquette.
Keeping the conversation flowing is vital
This is probably the hardest part of a date because jangling nerves can make it difficult to keep the conversation flowing.
Try to think of interesting things to talk about, hobbies, interests, positive life experiences, perhaps from traveling and exploring amazing places, but if your date starts to look a tad bored then change the subject of your conversation.
Avoid talking over your date too, it is very off-putting and rude.
Don't take to mocking or debasing interests or things which your date speaks about, this is also a huge no-no!
Ensure that you listen to what your date has to say and don't just talk about yourself too much – this is a big turn off.
Don't get too political or opinionated on your first date either, these conversations can be misconstrued and you’ll have time to debate them at a later date, all being well.
Avoid mentioning ex-partners and if the conversation comes up, keep your opinions about your own ex, as pleasant, short and concise as possible, avoiding elaborate and in-depth detail, 'too much information' can also be a huge turn off!
You don't want to risk your date thinking you are still hung up on your ex-partner by talking too much about them.
Make sure you smell nice, that you are wearing clean clothing and are not perspiring. There is nothing more of a turn off than someone who smelts of unpleasant odours such as sweat, cigarette/cigar smoke, bad breath, alcohol, drugs such as Marijuana/Cannabis, obnoxious perfume or aftershave, chemicals such as paint, garage oils or grease, musty clothing (that has been in a damp place), dog or cat smells, farm yard smells and who turns up looking scruffy and unkempt in something that will be an embarrassment for your date to be seen out with you in, it is all about respect for your date and for you!
Chewing gum is also off putting, so resist that too!
Dirty or poorly manicured finger nails/hands, poorly applied make-up, heavy make-up are also a turn-off.
Brush your teeth and ensure your breath smells fresh, dirty teeth and halitosis (bad breath) are massive turn offs as are brown stained or black teeth and chapped lips.
Do not flirt with other people, and especially those of the same gender as your date, that will ruin your chances of any future dates.
It is so important to be polite and have good manners.
Ensure you have good table manners and don't talk with your mouth full of food.
Avoid using foul language and making a mess of the table, your clothing or hands, and especially if you are eating,
Don't eat too fast either, this is a turn off too!
Be thoughtful and romantic but don't come across too strong as this can off putting.
It is all about balance, not too much and not too little about any given thing.
Women, please note that men like to pursue, they don't like to be pursued!
Sit at a right angle to one another
Try and sit at a right angle to each other so that there are other places to look apart from directly at each other.
This will make you both feel more relaxed and the date will feel less intense or like a job interview or interrogation event!
It is rude to use your phone when out on a date
Do not have your phone on the table throughout the date.
You shouldn't look at your phone either, as this is also very rude.
Where possible, switch your phones off and leave them in a pocket or if a woman, in a handbag.
Only answer the phone if it is an emergency.
If you have children and are worried that the baby sitter may try and get in touch with you, then explain this at the beginning of the date.
Checking your phone can be interpreted as you being bored rather than worrying about the sitter.
Paying the dreaded bill in a restaurant!
This is always the difficult part, so who should pay?
It is always good for both parties to offer to pay for the bill, or at least their part.
People have very different ideas on this situation.
Some people believe it is their duty to pay for the entire bill, others feel that splitting the bill is the way forward.
If your date insists on treating you to a meal and paying for both your meal and theirs, avoid ordering the most expensive dishes or drinks on the menu, choose something around or just below the same price as the food your host/date is ordering for themselves, be fair and be seen as a person who is not into taking advantage of the good nature and generosity of others.
If you take into account this rule, then you are more likely to be offered a follow on date too!
Even the most generous and wealthiest of hosts/dates in offering to pay for you both can feel taken advantage of!
No one likes 'Gold diggers' and 'meal ticket merchants' who take advantage of the generosity of others, even if they insist on you ordering whatever you like, it doesn't mean that you should do so, whose to say that they are not testing you, to see if you are the sort of person who takes advantage of their generosity?!
There is no right or wrong answer to this, but get a feel from your date as to their wishes. If they are happy for you to pay, then by all means go ahead and pay for the bill.
If you feel they are uncomfortable then just split the bill. If the date has gone well, there should be another date where you can split the bill or take it in turns once again.
You should always follow the rule of less is more on a first date.
Only you can judge the situation in terms of whether you should part with a handshake or a friendly kiss - and that will be down to how well the date has gone. But whatever you decide, be confident in your action.
If it is a handshake, make it a firm one and if it is a kiss, make it friendly... no tongues or French kissing, and avoid ending up in bed on your first date!
Don't ever allow yourself to be pressured into ending up in bed either.
First dates should be no more than a hug and a kiss on the cheek; they will respect you more in the long run, so don't cheapen yourself by taking things onto a more intimate footing on a first date, irrespective of the level of attraction. Restraint = Respect!
If you've had an enjoyable date then it is always good to text your date to thank them for the night. But, wait until your date replies before sending anymore texts! There is nothing more off putting than sending your date a barrage of endless texts it could ruin your chances of the relationship progressing forward into something meaningful like eventual marriage.
From their response, you will be able to gauge whether or not you want a second date. If your date doesn't respond then wait until they do.
Don't keep hassling them, be realistic in your expectations.
If you get no response then perhaps they aren't that interested, so please have some self-respect and accept this, stalking and harassment is a criminal offense for which you can be sent to prison.
When you meet someone you really like it is often hard to exercise restraint and patience, you will naturally want to see more of your hot date, but chasing them, harassing them with texts, phone calls, emails, Whatsapp messages, Facebook messages, stalking their social media profiles, spying on them and going in hot pursuit of them is going to scare them off. People's mobile phones are not electronic tags for you to keep a check on them with! Making yourself too readily available and over-zealously pursuing someone can turn you in to a doormat - a doormat someone will walk all over on the way out to someone else, less zealous and who respects a doormat? - Yes - No one! Being a desperado in over-zealous pursuit can make you come across as a 'desperado' too, and that is highly off-putting - most people view something that comes too easily, as suspicious - what's the catch?! Don't fall into that trap! Stalking is a criminal offense!
Emotional insecurities - perhaps in the wake of suffering a cheating partner, are no excuse for endlessly spying on or checking up on a date/partner, stalking them, sending streams of texts, Whatsapp messages, emails, phoning them incessantly quizzing or interrogating them, being intrusive, overly inquisitive about someone's every move when you are apart, being too expectant of future dates, wanting to see them too often, stifling them,being overly possessive, trying to isolate them from their friends and family etc, all of these things will scare your date off. Don't go there!
First date and flowers
Remember - be thoughtful and romantic but don't come across too strong as this can off putting, being overly zealous can make you appear to be a 'desperado'. Not good!
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Thanks for reading!
Best of luck on your first date!
Bright positive blessings,
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The following birth data is required to calculate the Synastry (astrological love compatibility):
(1) Full name (forename and surname)(ie. George Clooney).
(2) Date of birth (ie. 6th June 1976)
(3) Time of birth and please state Am or Pm) (if known) (ie. 11.30 pm, 2.15 am etc)
(4) Place of birth (to the nearest major town or city and also the country of birth) (ie. London, England, York England etc.
The time and place of birth are what determines what your ascendant or rising sign is, this is very important in all astrological calculations as you will read further down this page.
If you don't know your true time of birth you can find this out by doing what is known as a birth time rectification and you can do this for free, on line by going to:
Just a few hours out with the time of birth for Synastry (astrological love compatibility charts) can mean the difference between good compatibility and no compatibility, astrology is a specific science and the accuracy of birth data really is, mission critical!
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